Reflection

The end of another calendar year inevitably brings about reflection.

They say if you can look back at a year and laugh, cry, feel a range of emotions and know that you learned something, then it was not a wasted year.

I laughed:
so many times I can't keep track. I laughed until I was in tears and afraid I'd wet myself while being silly with Mare. I laughed almost to the point of hysterics when the freak windstorm blew up while I was walking with Vassy. "Where ARE we?!". And I laugh just about every day with Brad because we have the same ridiculous sense of humour.

I cried:
so many times I can't keep track. I cried happy tears when Brad proposed. I cried happy tears (with a few lonely tears mixed in) when Mare told me she was engaged. I cried sad and worried tears when my grandpa passed away. I cried frustrated tears when I was so overtired and stressed I couldn't see straight. I cried when I left Smithers both times last year because I never know when I'll see my family again. Yes, I definitely cried.

I was angry:
occasionally. I was definitely furious when I backed into the stupid car that was parked illegally directly in the way of my parking space. I'm still angry about that. I've been angry, but it doesn't last. I've learned from the situations and moved on.

I've been amused:
daily. By everyone, and just about everything. I'm amused by my close friends. I'm deeply amused by Leighton (who is the greatest 3 year old I've ever met) and Alex (who is always busy and doing something, but I guess that's what 1 year olds are all about), and Ollie (who really should get a category of his own).

I learned:
a great deal. I learned how to ride a motorcycle (in theory) and a scooter (in practice). I learned how to hula hoop, and do it well. I learned that the best way to deal with someone who is making your life miserable is to change the way you react to them. I learned that I will never fit in completely and that I'm much happier if I don't. I learned that my beliefs are not in sync with most of the people I surround myself with, but that doesn't have to matter, and some things are better left unsaid and untouched anyway. I learned that there are things to compromise on, and there are things to dig your fingernails into and hold on to tightly. And I learned that even the worst experiences and worst choices of your life happened for a reason, even if that reason is so that you won't be judgemental of a friend who is in the same place and doesn't know what to do.

So, here's to the end of another year and the things that await in 2009.